There's a Master Plan

I'm in the bleachers at my daughter's gymnastics class. In front of me is a 95ish woman who has come to watch her great grand daughter's lesson.

A nearby mother asks the elderly woman if she has any children.

"Yes, two. My son is a doctor," she says with some pride. "My daughter was a school teacher."

"Where do they live?" the mother asks.

"My son...." She pauses in thought. "He lives in California."

"Sunny California," the mother says with a smile.

"My daughter passed away."

"Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that. Was she ill long?"

"Pulmonary disease."

"So sorry."

"It shouldn't happen that way." I think she is talking about losing a child, not about the manner of death. But I could be wrong.

The mother nods. "There's a master plan," she says.

There's a master plan. I suppose it makes her feel better. To lose a loved one is a terrible thing. Especially when a parent loses a child. It must give great comfort believing that some greater power has a plan that includes your loved one. It must make it easier to just shut off thoughts of pain and loss and accept some greater purpose. A defense mechanism against the pain. And what about questioning that purpose? What purpose does God have in taking the life of a child? Best not to ask. God's purpose is inscrutable. Just rest easy in the knowledge that there's a master plan.

There are actually high schools like this?

I couldn't believe it when I saw this article on MSNBC. A high school that forbids dancing is going to suspend one of its students if he goes to another school's prom.

Sounds like a bad Kevin Bacon movie.



Clearly the family doesn't agree with their fundamentalist Baptist school's rules. What brought them to send their son to the school in the first place? Did they think the honor code they signed would never be enforced?

According to the Baptist school's principal the teen choose to please himself instead of pleasing God. What is God's punishment for dancing?

China?

"How old is your daughter?" asks the young woman behind the register.

"She's five," I reply.

"She's very pretty. I have a five year old as well."

I nod. "I like this age. Their brains are like sponges."

"I'm adopted. My parents...."

Ahhh, she thinks may daughter is adopted. Not the first time.



The woman is hustling her daughter through the daycare. Everyone is always in a hurry during morning drop-off. We all have to get to work on time. She sees me and says, "China?"

Huh? China? What kind of morning greeting is that? Then I see her eyes flick past me to my daughter.

Ahhh, China. "No, my wife was born in Korea."

The woman seems disappointed.




The guy running the inflatable bounce tent turns to me and says, "I have an adopted child from China too."

Sigh. "My daughter's not adopted. My wife was born in Korea."

"Sorry, didn't mean to assume--"

"No problem."




A girl walks up to me in the pet store and says, "Is your little girl adopted?"

"No, her mother is Korean." The girl looks confused. I don't think she knows what Korea means.

"I'm from China," she says. "My mommy didn't want me."

Urk. How do you respond to a statement like that? And what the hell have people been saying to you?





A new girl has joined my daughter's gymnastics class. On appearance, I assume the girl is adopted. Her mother and I get into a conversation about elementary schools. After a bit, she says, "Your daughter's hair is very beautiful."

"It's never been cut," I reply. "Not even a trim."

"She's very pretty. Our daughter's hair was very short when we adopted her. What province is your daughter from?"

What province? That's new. Since when is Montgomery County a province?





I'm at a computer training seminar. On my computer screen are several images of my daughter. The instructor walks by and says, "Where's your daughter from?"

"My wife." I deadpan.

"Oh, ah. She's very pretty." The instructor moves on.





My wife, my neighbor, my neighbor's brother, and I are in a conversation in my backyard. My daughter is playing in the sandbox.

Our neighbor has adopted a girl from China. Our neighbor's brother is married to a Chinese woman.

At one point the brother says, "Your daughter looks like your wife."

"Yeah," I say, "She favors her mother."

"Do you mind?"

Huh? Do I mind that she looks "Korean" or do I mind that she looks like my wife? Is this guy for real? He's married to a Chinese woman. Would HE mind if their kid came out looking like his wife? My brain wants to jump out of my head and run around the yard screaming.

Luckily my neighbor calls her brother an idiot before I get a chance to.

God and the Swine Flu

Daniel Florien at Unreasonable Faith posted his response to a mock-news article on the Swine Flu.

At the end of his response, Daniel wrote: If a human modifies a virus and sets it loose, he’s a monster and a criminal. But when a god supposedly does it, he is given excuse after excuse.

Daniel's comment made me wonder about the various religious responses to natural disasters such as the Swine Flu.

1) Just as with Hurricane Katrina, some religious leaders are claiming that the Swine Flu is God's punishment for immoral behavior. After all, New Orleans is a city of sin and deserved to be destroyed. I'm sure the Mexicans did something wrong to deserve this. Maybe is it because they are a bunch of Papists. This view shows us the grumpy God of the Old Testament.

2) Another view is that God did it, but we don't know why. Sometimes God does bad things to good people, but it is beyond us to comprehend His reasoning (and we shouldn't try). Who are we to question Him? Just have faith that it was all for a good reason and the good will receive their just reward.

3) Maybe God didn't do it, but just let it happen. Do we expect an omniscient, omnipotent God to help us out of every little difficulty? Are we incompetent children that need help out of every jam? After all, it is no crime to refuse to help someone when it is in our power to do so. No?

4) Maybe God can't stop natural disasters. Whoops, scratch that. Not much of a God if He can't stop disasters. (Maybe He can just create them?)

5) Or there is the Deist view. God created the world and all its natural laws, and then laissez faire. Hands off. God has no interest in interfering in His creation. God as the watchmaker.

So what is the answer? Does God intentionally create disaster or does he refuse to stop them? What's His excuse?

*edited to correct numbering*

Tim Minchin

I have to thank Daniel Florien at Unreasonable Faith for introducing me to Tim Minchin.

First off is one of the funniest songs I have ever heard. My wife (who I love dearly) would not appreciate my enjoyment of it. (That's why I haven't played it for her.)



Next is a nine minute beat style poem that is worth every second. Many an atheist have found themselves in a similar situation.



Am I still an atheist if I worship Tim Minchin?

Spotlight

Somewhere out there is a German farmer who hates me.

I've torn up his fields (it really was a mistake).

I've scared his cows (I couldn't help it).

I've kept him up at night (I just didn't have a choice).

I did all this as a UH-60 Blackhawk pilot in the US Army. You see, this farmer's property was right on the edge of a major military training zone. Ground troops didn't use this particular area much at all. However, the region was perfect for night vision goggle training for pilots.

One night, he had just plain had enough. We had two helicopters buzzing around the edge of his property practicing night-vision air-assault landings in some meadows. We could see his farmhouse in the distance. And we could see him coming for us.

It was almost 11PM when he came racing up the road in his pickup truck. Now what, you might think, could a farmer in a pickup do to us? Shoot us down? Nah-too violent and illegal. He would spotlight us.

Spotlighting is the practice of taking a powerful flashlight, or plug-in spotlight, and aim it at a helicopter pilot using night vision goggles. The beam of light has the effect of overloading the goggles and temporarily shutting them down. This, combined with the bright light shining in the cockpit, blinds the pilots and makes them unable to fly. If you are in flight when you are spotlighted you usually have to gain altitude and fly away from the light.

However, when the farmer hit us with his spotlight, we were on the ground. I was in the right seat (the same side as the farmer) and was absolutely blinded by the powerful spotlight. As we had landed in a light LZ with trees surrounding us, we couldn't risk taking off in our blinded condition. He had us pinned.

Unfortunately for him, he had made a tactical error. Maybe in all of the noise he hadn't realized it, but there were two helicopters. And we had a radio.

We gave our buddies a call and asked them for a little help. No problem.

They blacked out their lights (becoming effectively invisible in the pitch black night) and flew toward our oppressor. With all of the noise, he didn't realize what was happening until it was too late.

Our friends put their helicopter right on top of the farmer's head and hit him with their 400 zillion watt landing light and their 200 zillion watt searchlight.

I can only imagine the farmer's terror. Buffeted by hundred mile an hour winds, blasted by dust and debris, blinded by brilliant light, he dropped his pathetic torch and lunged for the safety of his truck. It must have seemed as if the brawny helicopter was going to land on top of him.

The pickup raced down the road, pursued by our friends. Bouncing down the road behind the truck was his still-shining spotlight, dragged by the power cord plugged in to his truck's cigarette lighter.

Poor guy. All he wanted was a quiet night.

Somewhere out there is a German farmer who hates me.

At least he kept us safe

The mantra for Bush apologists is, "At least he kept us safe."

They've given up on defending his economic policies. They admit he ruined our international reputation and moral authority. And there might be a few issues with Constitutional and international law. But....

"At least he kept us safe."

Bullshit.

He killed over four thousand United States military personnel. He permanently disabled fifteen thousand more.

How did he do this? By sending them to fight in the wrong war.

Bush was the Commander in Chief. It was his decision to make war on Iraq. Don't feed me a line that he was misled by poor intelligence and bad advisers. He chose the hawkish advisers. He chose to ignore evidence that went against his vision. He pushed for intelligence reports that fit his desires.

It was his decision to make. He wanted war with Iraq, and that is what he got.

Don't you dare tell me that he kept us safe. He didn't. The blood of dead soldiers, sailors, airmen, and marines is on his hands.

And because of his obsession with Iraq, the war in Afghanistan was bungled. More blood will be shed. American blood. All because of Bush's failures as the defender of our nation.

At least he kept us safe? Tell it to the dead.

Pistols, Dawn, Flagpole

My good friend Mike wrote a long reply to my last blog post. I'm going to reply to his reply with a new blog entry.

I'll try to reply in the same order as is found in Mike's post.

Evidence for god(s). I'm going to say that the burden of proof rests with the theists on this one. It is impossible for me to disprove the existence of something that doesn't exist. Prove that there aren't fairies in my garden. (I didn't invent that phrase.) To this point in my life no one has proven to me that their god exists. If I had such proof I would be a member of their religion.

I am not saying that I know for certain that no god exists. One or more could exist. I haven't been found sufficient evidence to believe it.

We exist. Could a god have created the universe? Sure. Does the fact the the universe exists prove that any particular religion is "right"? No.

Is any one religion more "right" than another? No. Do the members of various religions believe that their religion is the "right" one? Of course. If they didn't, they would leave. Unless they couldn't because they fear for their lives. However, I think it would be a rather arrogant position to assume that everyone would join "my" religion if they had the chance, they are just afraid of X (being disowned, divorced, imprisoned, tortured, or killed). I wonder how many theists have taken a deep an honest look at other religions. Why do they reject the others? What makes their own evidence better?

Are there religions that are "nicer" than others? Absolutely. There are (and have been) some really nasty, bloodthirsty religions out there. On the other end of the scale, Mike and his family follow Christian teachings in their benevolent best. However "nice" and "right" aren't the same thing. If I'm going to join a religion it is going to be the "right" one. So far I have found no evidence that any religion is "right".

Biblical contradictions. These really aren't that big a deal to me, but they exist. Some, to me, are trivial. Genesis I and II contradict each other as to the order of creation. I don't worry too much about any religion's creation stories. Some are more serious. There are multiple accounts of Christ's last words on the cross. Why are they different? Why do Matthew and Luke report different words? Who was right? Some contradictions have to do with the nature of God. Is he benevolent or vengeful? He does great kindness on one hand and then massacres innocents with the other. Christ urges kindness, while the Bible invokes death for gays, unfaithful wives, non-virgin daughters, and disobedient children.

But again, these items are not that serious for me. All religions have issues with interpretation and consistency. I don't have a particular beef with Christianity over any other religion. I am not one of those atheists who denies the very existence of Christ. I think the historical evidence clearly shows he existed. I personally believe he was one of the (maybe THE) greatest moral teacher of all time.

My closing line in my blog entry about Specialist Smith. When she came back to me and asked how I knew what her mother would say, my response was "Jeez, I already told you how I know." Mike, you thought I was talking about being an atheist. I was talking about being the devil. Cue the sinister music, I knew what your mother was going to say because I am the devil. MWAHAHAAHA!

Specialist Smith was clearly utterly baffled at being confronted by a non-Christian. I was an entity from completely outside her realm of existence.

Capitalizing God. That blog entry was the first time I had elected to not capitalize God. I don't think I'll do it again. 1) It makes me look like I don't know grammar. 2) It could be interpreted as an intentional insult, and I am not one for that.

I knew that it was grammatically incorrect--so why did I do it? Here's my possibly convoluted thinking. Is the Judeo-Christian god's name actually "God"? Or is it Jehovah, or Yahweh, or something else? Was "God" selected as an alternative because speaking one of the other names was against the rules? In the past I have had several students who have reinforced this notion. They would write God as "G-d" because it was against the rules of their (I don't know which) religion to write God's name. I remember seeing it and thinking, Are you freaking serious? Your god would be angry at you for writing his name? Doesn't he have better things to do with his time? Etc..

Soooo.... I wrote "God" as "god" in my effort to de-emphasize him in the pantheon of gods. One god, in my book, is no better than any other.

Bah, I don't like it. Good grammar is good grammar. God will be God for now on.

But now I've got a great name for my next cat.



See you soon, Mike!

And if anyone else reads this, check out Mike's website: www.mikeshultzfiction.com

I am the Devil

There are a lot of religious people in the Army.

I was not one of them.

One afternoon, in our unit's hanger, we got into a religious discussion. During the discussion I mentioned that I was an atheist.

"What's that?" Specialist Smith asked.

"What's an atheist? It's someone who doesn't believe in god."

She stares at me in utter incomprehension. I have clearly overloaded her circuits. "What do you mean? You don't believe in God? You don't believe in Jesus?"

"I believe Jesus was a person. A great person, and a great teacher. But I don't believe he was the son of god. I don't believe that there is a god. I haven't for several years now."

This is too much for her to take. She stares at me with mouth agape. "I can't believe this."

I shrug. I mention a few of the reasons for my atheism: no evidence that one religion is any more right than any other, no evidence for god, too many contradictions in Christianity, etc.

"My momma's not going to believe this," she says.

"You know what she's going to say?"

"What? My momma?"

"She's going to say that you were talking to the devil. She's going to say that the devil was trying to turn you away from Christ."

I ask her why she is a Christian. She talks about being in church, and a light through a stained glass window, and an overwhelming feeling of love, and blah, blah, blah.

Duty calls. The conversation ends.

I pass by Specialist Smith a few days later. She stares at me, a worried expression on her face, and she says, "How did you know what my momma was going to say to me?"

Jeez, I already told you how I know.

I Hope Obama Fails

Rush Limbaugh disgusts me.

He hopes President Obama fails. But what would that mean?

Failure would mean that the current recession (the worst US economy since the Great Depression) would become deeper, and last longer. It would, in fact, become a depression. It would be a great tragedy to millions of Americans.

Failure means continued lack of health insurance for tens of millions of Americans. We call ourselves the "richest nation in the world," but let our people go without basic care. Millions of American families are harmed (many ruined) by the lack of this fundamental service.

Failure would mean a bungled withdrawal from Iraq and more deaths in Afghanistan. How many more American deaths does Limbaugh want? Failure means more.

So, why would Limbaugh want President Obama to fail?

Because success would disprove everything Limbaugh believes in. Success would destroy his religion of hyper-conservatism. Success would mean that everything he has been spouting off about for twenty-plus years was wrong. The idea that government can do good is too much for him to take. Success would show that liberal ideas can work.

So he hopes for failure. Because only failure will prove his religion true.

Rush Limbaugh wants you to be miserable. Because only if you are miserable, can he be right.

And after all, that is what it is all about.

Legalization

I've never used marijuana. Or cocaine. Or heroin. Or any other drug that is illegal in the United States. Even if they were to be legalized I wouldn't touch any of them. I have no interest in them at all.

My only vices: I drink an occasional red wine. Sometimes beer.

Having said all that, I am in total agreement with Johann Hari on the topic of legalization. This is an outstanding article.

http://www.johannhari.com/archive/article.php?id=1447

We're atheists

Because I teach in the community where I live, I am often asked by local residents about the quality of our school district. It is a fairly prosperous area, and many people choose to send their children to private schools. My response to them is, "don't do it!" We have a wonderful school district that provides many great opportunities to our students.

The other day I was talking to the principal/manager of my daughter's daycare and she mentioned her hunt for a private school. I told her how good our public schools are, but she said that wanted her kids to get a religious education. To which I responded:

"Ah, we don't have to worry about that."

"Why not? You don't go?"

"No, we're atheists."

Her eyes bug out as she says, "What? You don't believe?"

She then ties me to a stake, piles brush around me, and sets it on fire. Lucky for me, our local fire department is very good.

Hah, that last part didn't really happen. An atheist hasn't been burned at the stake for at least two years now.

Actually the conversation continued in a very congenial manner as I briefly explained the reasons for my atheism. But that's not what this entry is about.

This entry is really about not hiding what I am. It would have been easy to say, "Yeah, we just don't go to church." That would have been the the end of the conversation. But, I don't "just not go." People who "just don't go" are slackers. If I were a theist, I would go. Once upon a time, when I was considering becoming a minister (subject of a future blog entry) it was very important to me. I wouldn't have considered not going.

I'm not a slacker. I don't go, because I don't believe. I'm an atheist. And while I don't wear that fact on my forehead, I'm also not afraid to let you know it.